I wonder hows my friend doing. Im not saying that I miss them but actually that I missed everyone of them including my teachers too. Thats include my teacher that is at overseas that is Miss Rose..

Just wondering hows everyone doing. Whether they are happy,sad, or even what. But I know for one thing that everyone is looking for a job and I have found one that make me became so tan and kinda dark tat is working under the hot sun. How terrible can it get. I mean how pathetic can it get.

I dont mind at all just making sure that I will think about my beloved Sunshine. Miss him very badly that I wanna died. How I wish I will see him tomorrow at my work place and that will be great. I know that will never happen but how I wish for a miracle to happen at my work place.

Imagines that my beloved Sunshine is coming to my workplace, how wonderful can it be but I know that all of this wont come true. He would rather play street soccer with his beloved friends and brother. Who am I to him asking him to come to my workplace. Unless he's my close friend then I can ask him to come but hes only my beloved Sunshine in my mind and my heart.

Gonna endure all of this. I know that my friend say that theres still many guys out there. I dont care what they say. I really happy that hes my last malay guy that I like him.

Thanks a lot , Sunshine. <3

I will miss you. <3

I <3 YOU ! ! !

Some poems or quotes

there are times for you together and there are times for you to be apart

if my wound has heal please forgive me and if my wound has forever heal please forget about me

if its not yours you will have to let go and if its yours it will return back to you

sumday u'll forget about me my name,my voice, who I am,what I am to you but even if you forget about me jus wanna u to know that I will never forget you

what had done, cannot be undone, it will remain the same

no one can predict what will happen in the future, NO ONE. Except for HIM..

my eyes are hurting coz I cant see you,

my arms are empty coz I cant hold you,

my lips are cold coz I cant kiss you,

and my heart is breaking coz Im not wif you.

Finally, the story of "What Hurts The Most"

has ended that I have been doing for the past 2 an a half month.

That can make my brain go burst but it didnt burst at all just need to rack

my brain about what should I write but some parts, I got fabricated them.

Need to fabricate them, so it will be more interesting enough and also

giving me more ideas of what to write.

Kinda unique and hidden talent that I have

that is writing a comic/storyboard line since I was Primary 6,

thats been 4 years that I wrote it.

Whoever I rejects me in real life, Im gonna twist my words

in the story so whatever its the story kinda funny,sad and happy.

But mostly, in the story I am the one who is always dying..

Totally nuts, every story that I made is always me that is dying and time

again and again Im the one who will be in an accident or even dying.

Nothing better things that I can write about myself.

Maybe the next story, Im gonna changed the method of making it maybe

Im gonna saved my friend from being stabbed. I guess..

I cant think of anything that is good maybe thats the

only way for me to make myself entertain..

If I dont like that person anymore and if I were

to read it, Im gonna laugh and keep grinning because its

very funny and I will not believe that I like this particular guy..

It will be very unbelieveable..LOLS..

miss me,

ayuhaha_miss_sunshine

Flashing back to 17 October 2009



I will just say everything about Sunshine, morever this post will be everything about Sunshine so have fun reading them and maybe you you will be able to know who am I talking about.



At first when I was at sun tanning myself and I sees him walking towards the place. Immediately, I went inside the side to hide my presence from him and eventually I got to face him when Im taking my lunch and actually I was at the shore drying myself and after a while I see him playing soccer with our friends.



Inside the sea, we were playing polo water and I was somewhere that is far besides I was floating away and after a while I stopped floating and from there I started to play with him and then my friend helplessly help me call him to play with us when I was about to go to the shore and have a rest. Since, he is at the shore I shall forgo the resting and keep looking at him until the end of the day and soon or later, I may not be able to see him anymore.

There was one time, he purposely throw the balls at me and I was not angry or even sad but I was just hoping more than that he is talking to me but I didnt write in the letter about him giving me a wonderful memory on 17 October but I totally forgetten about it. How dumb can I get since the letter and outing has occured what can I do just keep flashing back about the letter and also the picture of him and thats the only thing that I can think about.

Once again, I would like to take the opportunity to thanks all of my friends for putting up with my nonsense and crap. Thanks a lot, people. Thanks for being there for me. Thank you. Hope that you will like the letter that I have given you 1 week ago.

Thanks for everything.

Date: 16 October 2009

I watched it at Vivo City with Wei Rong,Tze Hao and Jane. I went to Jane's house and fetch her and it was actually a surprised because the night before I told her maybe yes or maybe no I am not going because Im kinda sad about the Graduation thing and immediately shecalled me back and asking me, why I am not going at the last minute eventually she can read my mind, she say I am sick and that's why I am not going and there was when she made me sad and I cry for at least few minutes and its kind pathetic to cry through the cellphone and when we've put down the phone Itext her and I say "If tomorrow, I does not appearat your house , it means I am not going to watch the movie.." but I went to watch the movie..I picked her up wearing black t-shirt and jeans.. She gave me comment about the bag and this time round I look kinda different. Then, I gave her the letter that I wrote for her on two days ago. I told her to read the letter before going out and she really read the letter and I see her reading the letter and few minutes later, we went off.. Then, she called me a mother because I keep her wallet inside my bag and that's really very nice of her calling me as Mummy or even Mama..LOLS..We went to AMK Hub and meet up Wei Rong and then on the way, sees Khaliff and Khai at AMK Hub. Meet up Tze Hao at Vivo City and when inside the theatre and Tze Hao and Jane while Wei Rong and I seat together at the same row. The funny part was, Wei Rong usual thing that he will do is opening his mouth very wide while I make sound effect , as for Jane she will keep adjusting until she gets the right spots of which side to seat at and Tze Hao will keep folding his hands or evenput his hands inside the pocket and the moviewas kind scary,funny,romance and sacrifice. About the scary part is about the tsunami thing even though its only a computer thing but still its so scary. About the funny part, people being hitting time again and wanting to pull the child's teeth and its very funny..LOLS.. About the romance part, where a lifeguard wanting to save a lady that is drown and that's really very funny. About the sacrifice part, when the tsunami occured the lifeguard when to save the lady and man , when the lady has been saved, except for the lifeguard and the guy has not been saved, the lifeguard sacrifice and I cry..

finally, everything is done. all is done.

printing and typing it in one day and my

body feels very aches and now cutting

them into half. Up next, hoping that my

classmate will apperciate all my hardwork

that I have been doing like one month ago.

now waiting for day to come which I am not

sure whether to give the letter today or even

on Saturday. I will give some of the today and the

reason is because some of them are not going to the

outing that I made. I hope that they will like my small gift

of mine even though it sound as if I am gonna died but thats the

only thing that I can do for them and soon later, we will not be

seeing each other again. The last thing that I can do for them and

I hope that they will apperciated.

I WILL JUST FIT EVERYTHING IN AND I DONT CARE WHETHER YOU UNDERSTAND IT !

Date: 5 October 2009

Last monday, I give him a new nickname that is Sunshine,its because his name starts with the letter "S"..Then,behaving intimately with my T.T.M that is best-close-guy-friend that is Khaliff then during exam I had some other then and I list down all the guys that I like and supposingly people went to have an exam is to make sure you do well in your studies and after few minutes, I was shocked to see that being 4 years in AMKSS and overall I had 16 guy that I like and that was really shocking to know.

Date: 6 October 2009

Make an eye contact wif Mr Sunshine and that's so great. Such a unforgetful memory that he had given me during the exam.Hahaha.. He is making me unbearable as if he cant make me breathe properly and all of my attention is directly to him but no one else. Sounds really pathetic,isnt it?

Date: 7 October 2009

Make an eye contact with Sunshine again..LOLS.. I am going GAGA over him. I like it so much. I would prefer making an eye contact at class and that will make me nuts whenever I seat at and I will facing towards him and thats really great. Its just so great. Day by day, I am getting overboard about him and yyou know what I like it a lot..

Recently, I have being flashed back about this person in what ocassion I also dont know why. Perhaps there was one time I went to lunch cum dinner with him and I sat beside him and people will be able to know that I like him even my unit's friend can tell that I like this pathetic guy. I dont know why I like someone like him. Maybe I got some unique taste of liking a guy that is good in their studies I guess. I caught him red handed when I was taking a Drill exam and I saw him staring at me for quite long time. Not long later, I took the same bus to school to witness the NCC Land R.O.D. , when I got inside the bus and I thought, theres no one but there was one time I turned my head and I found out that he is also inside the bus and I begun to freak out and once I got out of the bus, I quickly rushed off to the school and immediately tell my close friend that I took the same bus as him and almost the Sec 4 knows about it and I was like "OMG,they seemed to know about it!". After few minutes, while we were witnessing the parade, my friends offer me and say,"Hidayu,you should seat beside him ",and I stare at my friends for few minutes and I am back to normal. Half hour later,he went back home and I guess he watch Transformers with his friends. We went to have our lunch at KFC, we keep wondering where we should go..It was a memorable day for me. Then, I decided to go and watch midnight movie that is at Orchard and I am the only girl. Few days later,I was been grounded because I went out with 4 guys in the night but they are my friend that I know for 4 years. Is there any wrong with it..?? So,I guess he really make my HIGH SCHOOL LIFE go wild. Well, his name is Calvin Tay..

Date : 2 October 2009

During MT lesson, we didnt have any lesson but we were cleaning up the room and called Klein to come inside the class and there's also I suggest to my teacher to call him and Xiao Wei ask where is he and I say that he should be at the counselling room and when I went to the counselling room and indeed he was at there talking to Ms Mullai and after a while he got back to the classroom..

The boys is cleaning up the classroom and some of the boys did not help that is James, he went up to me and ask me what's wrong with my leg but for one thing, I like wearing sandals to school because my feets look small rather than the sports shoes..Hahaha..lols..

James told me that he will be make a music video and he say all those music that I have never heard of and I suggest to him why not use graduation song by vitamin c and I told him that Shi Jia say that I on the day of FAREWELL ASSEMBLY, I am the first person to cry during the assembly.

Please somone help me to endure this emotions of mine. Im just afraid that I will cry non-stopped that I couldnt stop at all..

Date: 1 October 2009





watch Phobia 2 again but this time wif kechiq,natasha,nad,dinie and heidi,khaliff,nana and I at Jubilee, we rushed to the cinema and it was boring for bothe kechiq and I because we watched it twice and we can remember what's gonna happen in the next few minutes and all of them will ask what will happen in the next few minutes and I told them just to watch and keep your mouth shut yet after few minutes they will start again and got some people watch horror movie and she listen to MP3, isnt that stupid and tats such a waste of money and you wanna watch the movie and instead you listen to MP3..I can say that is really such a waste of money..

HEY, I REALLY CANT BE BOTHER ANYMOR ABOUT THIS POST ! ! ! !

Date : 30 September 2009

Emotions gonna show up besides it has already show up like freak crying and crying until few days I stopped crying because my eyes look very swollen..

All got to do with Sunshine because he was very angry with Natasha and also myself and on Monday ; 28 September I cry all because of him..I cry when I listen to Breakaway by Kelly Clarkson and Xiao Wei was there with me when I cry very bad that Xiao Wei had to called Natasha to have a look at me and I cry in front of Natasha, Nad and Nana even Xiao Wei was in shocked to see me crying very badly..

Natasha was on the phone with S.Natasha telling her that I cry very badly..and after a while Natasha handed me the phone and I tried to lied but it's just because she can tell from my voice that I cry this bad that it has really change.. totally changed..

After a while, I am alright..I get too noisy that no one wll be able to take it..

In the afternoon, I went back home take cab not in the mood to take the public transport and that make me waste my 10 bucks and after that wash my sisters clothes that she will be going to work during late evening, and in the late aftenoon went out for the Hari Raya Celebration with Khaliff, Kechiq,Bengap,Aidil,Nad,Heidi,Nana,Ariffin,Matin and the others too..
( Did I miss out anyone??)

Then we slack at Sunshine's block and then I got see him and he's looking way too hot for me to handle after what he done to me..Hehehe..I know it's kinda weird to read this from me..

Then we went to Sabariah's house that is Khaliff's friends and after that we had no idea where to go.. My leg is injured due to the blisters..Thanks to Khaliff, he wore my heels and I wears his shoe and for the first time in my life my boy-friend is wearing the heels for me..I keeping saying thanks to him and keep saying " I love you and you really save my day by wearing the heels for me" and thanks a lot..


On the way to Diana's house, we were walking toward the house that is nearby where Sunshine play street soccer..Hahaha..Kinda weird,isnt it..? I told them whether they have any camera so that I can take picture..I told them can I zoom in and take his pictures and see that he's playing the soccer and how I wish he was there with me but I know that I went overboard about Sunshine..

After going to Diana's house we had decided to watched movie instead of visiting people and guess what I watched, we watched the Fame and the movie was totally great at first when we came in, the movie has started half way through, I seat beside all my bestie friends that is Kechiq,Bengap and Nad and so on.. I can tell you the whole list of people that who seats where but I can tell that Ariffin and Nana was not at there because Ariffin got tuition and Nana gotta go home..

On weekday, which people will have their open house on weekdays..?? That makes sense too..
But am visiting and also in the same time collecting collection of $$$..I know my intention kinda weird but thats what all of the teenagers thinks about..

I MISS MR SUNSHINE A LOT ! ! !

Im a sentimental person and now Im

writing letters for my classmate

and thats include my Sunshine..

Sunshine, we gonna go on our way

soon..Make a eye contact with you during

examination,my feelings of is so great that

I dont mind seating downbeside him and

making eye contact with him and he really

make my day with full of joyful and happiness

even now I can feel it.. It feels very great to like

someone and you'll start to imagine things that

can make you surprise and go wild..maybe I

really overboard..I'm just getting "obessed"

by him.Is that the right word for him or

what..hahaha..?

Mr Sunshine, Goodbye..

Today, instead of studying maths. Im typing letter for my classmate all of those 38 people and I told myself if I can write a comic until 100 page why cant I write a letter for 38 people..its fun typing all those stuff because it came from my deep bottom of my heart..some people may think that Im bull shitting just to get in people's good book, if you know what I mean..

Just a normal human being, biding goodbye to all my friends, I can say that I will be the first person to cry during the farewell assembly and I have to be cold-blooded for once, how I wish someone could help me with it. Once I cry there will no stopping of it, I will cry as if everyone of them gonna died..TOUCH WOOD! That's the only word that I can think of..

Someone help me, Im really afraid that Im unable to stopped crying..Recently, I cry like a billion times because of this farewell assembly thinking when will I be seeing all of them again and how will they look like and will they be able to recongnise one another especially my Sunshine, will he be able to recongnise my new look...Will he or will he not..??

FORGET OF EVERYTHING ! ! !

On Tuesday ; 29 Sep 2009

Today, I was not in emotion condition but mostly is laughing and giggling around the school and making a very loud noise whenever Sunshine is not around in the class so I will purpose will make a noise..



SORRY, CANT THINK OF WHAT EXACTLY HAPPEN ON THAT PARTICULAR DAY!!

SO, I WILL NOT BE TYPING ANYTHING ON THIS POST!!

On Monday; 28 Sep 2009,

was a crazy crazy day for me and emotions started to show up and I was like STMF! Idiot, all because of an idiot..Cry and cry but only my friends know about it and I cry from 8 am in the morning till 10 plus and it was all because of someone that first time in my life I cry this bad because I like my classmate that is malay and I was really pathetic on that day then during few periods later, I went crazy and I was disturbing my classmate like crazy and then I keep throwing things at my friends and scribbling papers on my friends and after went for a movie at Jubilee with my bestie Natasha watching Phobia 2 after a while shouting here and there, put our feets/leg at the chair where no one seat but then after a while I was burping like one idiot after sharing the popcorn with Natasha..Hahaha..Kinda funny, shouting here and there..Especially Natasha, she will shout when it's the most disgusting and scariest parts of the movie..Totally scary..